Jelly Trumpet – The Search for the most wonderful celebrity
Welcome to our sample guest script for Alex Horne on Jelly Trumpet. Just a bit of fun which we hope will lead to Alex guesting on ‘the world’s only comedy podcast about creativity.’
Thank you for reading!

S/FX: BONGOS BEING PLAYED
QUEEN ELEANOR OF AQUITAINE:
Arrête ça Nigel.
S/FX: DOOR BELL RINGING
JIM:
What was that strange sound?
MR B:
[VERY TETCHY] The doorbell Jim. [RESIGNED] I’ll get it.
S/FX: CREAKY DOOR OPENING
MR B:
Look Jim. It’s Alex Horne.
JIM:
Can’t be. He doesn’t look frightened enough.
MR B:
Good afternoon Mr Alex Horne.
ALEX:
Good afternoon…Is that a set of Bongos?
JIM:
Yes, it is. They are Nigel’s pride and noise.
MR B:
Where is Nigel Mr Jim?
JIM:
He’s practicing. You know. That Rage Against the Machine track.
MR B:
The one where he plays the oboe?
JIM:
That’s the one.
MR B:
We had that Greg Davis on Jelly Trumpet you know.
QUEEN ELEANOR OF AQUITAINE:
He was too large for the studio. We had to go on all fours.
JIM:
Turned our he made a great dining table for 12.
MR B:
Mind you he didn’t like all the crumbs getting in his ears.
JIM:
He enjoyed the wipe down with the damp sponge though.
ALEX:
He’s always enjoyed a damp sponge.
MR B:
Really?
JIM:
Enough prattle. We’re here to do a show.
ALEX:
Very well.
JIM:
We’d like you to be very funny and tell the world you love Jelly Trumpet.
MR B:
Share the goodness and we’ll appoint you Jelly Trumpet ambassador to the stars.
JIM:
Very well Mr b. Let’s get on.
S/FX: CLUNK, CLUNK, CLICK AND A WHOSH OF STEAM
MR B:
Ready. FOR ALL MANKIND!
ALEX:
What is that that? Is that a giant squirrel?
JIM:
Yes it is Alex. Nigel is our resident bongo playing giant squirrel And this is Queen Eleanor of Aquitaine from 12th century France.
QUEEN ELEANOR:
Monsieur.
ALEX:
What exactly is this madhouse?
TONY (VOICE OVER GUY):
Not a madhouse Alex. This is Jelly Trumpet.
INTERVIEW COUNTDOWN STARTS
MR B:
Well Jim, was Alex the most wonderful celebrity?
JIM:
Close.