Stuck in a Japanese anime computer game Danganronpa or easily distracted crew try to survive, recover the podcast starter motor and return to the leafy safety of St Albans.
Jim is put to the test with ‘bullets of truth.’ Thank the old gods and the new that cMac (the ultimate gizmo) is present and proving to be worthy of such a silly podcast.
The whole episode would appear to hinge on the use of bagels, an unusual plot development, and rare to see outside New York.
A vengeful Monokuma, a stuffed robotic bear, goes after our heroes. O’ a quote from this rather evil beast; ‘Every human has regrets, has things they’d like to go back and change. But I don’t! ’cause I’m a bear.’
Will they survive?
Of course, silly. This is a series. BUT will they get back to St Albans…unscathed?
You can listen to the sample of the episode on this page or popover to your streaming platform of choice and search for ‘Jelly Trumpet’.
Time to dive into the silly, surreal and odd world of Jelly Trumpet. It’s not for the feint of heart or those with a closed mind, o’ and we have some great music from the house band ‘We Paint Houses.’
Stuff We’ll Hear in this Episode:
- If the crew manage to avoid multiple mini-Monokumas with laser weapons
- Where the starter motor for the podcast has been taken
- Interview Countdown with David Baldwin, Baldwin&
- Mary, ‘The Entrepreneur’ explains her latest product range, for babies, Part II
The 9 Trumpets of Creativity
Check out ‘The 9 Trumpets of Creativity’ page (download a PDF, if you like).
In short, in this episode:
00:00 Micro Sitcom: The Start Up, Mary ‘The Entrepreneur’ in ‘The New Niche’
00:00 Ways of Seeing
00:00 Tales from Jim’s Medicine Journal
00:00 List of the Week, 10 Things to do with Piers Morgan
Plus
00:00 Jim’s Work Offer
00:00 House Band – ‘We Paint Houses’
00:00 Ends
Interview Countdown
12 Questions in 12 Minutes, with David Baldwin of Baldwin&
David has to be one of the coolest creatives we’ve met on Jelly Trumpet. An award winning creative director and founder of the Baldwin& agency in Raleigh, North Carolina, USA.
Listen to us chat about the joys of creativity. We discuss David’s creative work and touch on his other position of lead guitarist, with his band the Gumby’s.
Plus:
Bonus Episode with David
In this bonus episode David expands on this creative life, his work in all manner of fields makes him a true polymath. He’s funny, he’s fun and he’s rather insightful.
Please leave us a review on your streaming platform of choice. Well, if you like Jelly Trumpet. If you don’t then please keep schtum and forget this every happened.
Support Jelly Trumpet on Patreon:
[Exclusive stuff from Jelly Trumpet]
Our Sponsor:
Conversion Detectives
The Band:
We Paint Houses
Now, off with you and create something,
About Jelly Trumpet
We’re a podcast all about creativity. Every episode is aimed at stimulating your imagination and making you laugh with silly, surreal bits & bobs.
Sign up to the newsletter for sporadic creativity tips you can use every day, o’ and some rather silly jokes.
Sponsored by Conversion Detectives, the creative digital marketing agency
Read the Script
Season 2 Episode 05 – Magnify Minify Part II
S/FX: JELLY TRUMPET INTRO MUSIC
TONY:
Jelly Trumpet Season 2, Episode 5, Part II
S/FX: MULTIPLE LASERS SMALL EXPLOSIONS AND DISTANT SCREAMS FADE
K:
[JAPANESE GIRL VOICE]
JIM:
What is she saying?
ELEANOR:
My translation app says; she is scared. Many mini-Monokumas with laser weapons coming to kill. We must hide her.
MR B:
Golly, simply hundreds of the blighters and they’re destroying everything in their path with laser weapons.
S/FX: MULTIPLE LASERS SMALL EXPLOSIONS
K:
[JAPANESE GIRL VOICE]
ELEANOR:
She says we must leave or die.
MONOKUMA:
[THROUGH MEGAPHONE] [JAPANESE MAN VOICE]
MR B:
This isn’t like any computer games I play.
JIM:
Right! Well, we need a plan. It’s at moments like this…Science Mr b. Do some science.
MR B:
Well, er…I need a keyboard…
ELEANOR:
Why don’t you cook something Mr Jim? cMac!
cMAC:
Coming up…
JIM:
Yes the show must go on despite the real possibility of death by laser wielding mini-Monokuma bears.
S/FX: THE STARTUP THEME TUNE
THE STARTUP: THE ENTREPRENEUR’S ‘THE NEW NICHE’
PART 2
TONY:
The Startup, micro sitcom with Mary the Entrepreneur in ‘The Entrepreneur’s New Niche, Part 2. Mary is talking on Zoom to her bestie Bev about her new product line.
BEV:
You are seriously suggesting make up for babies and calling it BabyMaker?
MARY:
Yes I am Bev. So, when the baby goes on with their crying, dribbling, squinting, vomiting, balling up their fists…YES! Another product idea!
BEV:
What are you writing?
MARY:
BabyMaker baby hand cream ‘Uncoil Your Baby Cream’ moisturizes and unblocks baby’s fists’…Look, I’m just back from the studio, look at these promo photos!
S/FX: PROSECCO BEING POURED INTO A GLASS
BEV:
I am eating you know.
MARY:
This baby is Giles, just a hint of concealer for the dribbling, see the dribble stain has vanished! Here’s Caroline, see how the bronzer has made her look less pale and more interesting.
BEV:
O’ God! What’s that?
MARY HAS PUSHED A PICTURE CLOSE TO THE SCREEN
MARY:
That’s Simon. Wrong shade of blusher. Shouldn’t have used that one with his olive skin, It’s a blusher called ‘Fire in the Sky’. He’s more a ‘Pink Flush with Cinnamon undertones’ type of baby.
BEV:
He looks like a clown left out in the sun…all summer.
MARY:
Teething problems, which reminds me. What does baby need most when teething?
BEV:
Paracetamol?
MARY:
That’s right. BabyMaker Makeup Setting Spray.
BEV:
Why?
MARY:
You don’t want your hours of careful makeup application ruined by a baby in pain, do you?
BEV:
You know…Mary, Mary love. I’ve known you since primary school reception class. Mary, you know what you need?
S/FX: PROSECCO BEING POURED INTO A GLASS
MARY:
A copywriter, a developer, product testers, a website, email platform, SEO guru, social marketing mix, video. Yes, lots of videos of ‘BabyMaker’ children. Venture Capital? Branding agency? A business coach? Our own awards ceremony?
BEV:
A breakfast bottle of Prosecco.
MARY:
O’.
S/FX: THE START UP THEME
THE START UP: THE ENTREPRENEUR’S NEW NICHE
END
RIFF 7
S/FX: JAPANESE COMPUTER GAME MUSIC
MR B:
If only I had brought a keyboard.
JIM:
I could, er make a chilli.
ELEARNOR:
cMac. Hide us.
cMAC:
Engaging mode Stealth Minus M4.
S/FX: ELECTRICITY CRACKLING THEN A WHOOMPF SOUND
JIM:
Brilliant. Just brilliant your majesty.
ELEANOR:
Shhhhhh!
MONOKUMA:
[JAPANESE MAN VOICE]
JAPANESE GIRL:
[JAPANESE GIRL VOICE]
S/FX: SOUND OF FEET RUNNING AWAY
MR B:
How come they didn’t see us?
JIM:
Because Mr b. And I’m only going to say this once. Your Ultimate Gizmo cMac has shrunk us down to the size of mice.
MR B:
I did wonder about the Bagels suddenly looking so big.
K:
[JAPANESE GIRL VOICE]
ELEANOR:
The girl’s name is Kotoko and she is the Ultimate Drama.
MR B:
That’s all we need, another one.
JIM:
What? What are you implying? You’re not implying, are you?
ELEANOR:
She says we need ‘truth bullets’ they might come in handy.
JIM:
Who? Who? Who?…Who?
MR B:
O’ No! That’s bad.
JIM:
What?
ELEANOR:
Now you sound like an owl.
JIM:
Who?
MR B:
Those teddy bear things are dragging the podcast to that mysterious looking black skyscraper.
JIM:
Right follow me!
MR B:
We’re the size of mice Jim. That mysterious skyscraper is some distance away. I calculate it would [TYPING SOUND] take us eighteen hours and then if we meet…
JIM:
Who?
ELEANOR:
Don’t start that again.
JIM:
Who?
ELEANOR:
I told you!
MR B:
Anyone, we’ll be unable to defend ourselves. And another thing is we won’t be able to open the podcast door as we have mice-sized hands!
K:
[JAPANESE GIRL VOICE]
JIM:
What? Sorry your Majesty.
ELEANOR:
She’s saying and I’m thinking why don’t you make us full size again?
JIM:
Yes. I’d just thought of that too…cMac. Er, bigger please.
MR B:
cMac. Enlarge.
cMAC:
Enabling Growth Mode G4.
S/FX: ELECTRICITY CRACKLING THEN A WHOOMPF SOUND
JIM:
Hurrah! Full size again. Right! I’m going to write something.
MR B:
I will do science with cMac.
K:
[JAPANESE GIRL VOICE]
ELEANOR:
Yes Kotoko. Both of them.
cMAC:
Counting down to ‘Interview Countdown’ in twenty seconds.
JIM:
Hang on. I’ve got to write something.
cMac:
Fifteen, fourteen…
JIM:
I need…
cMAC:
Eleven…
MR B:
Got it! cMac! Make ‘bullets of truth’…
cMAC:
Nine…
JIM:
That’s science is it? “Make bullets of truth.” Is it? Is it?
ELEANOR:
Yes Kotoko. We’ll get on with it.
MR B:
I built cMac you know and I’ve downloaded and installed the whole of Wikipedia.
JIM:
That explains everything.
MR B:
Yes it does. It’s Wikipedia
JIM:
What?
MR B:
Everything is explained on Wikipedia. And Wikipedia says the game uses ‘bullets of truth…’ O’ my entry says I’m a musician and scientist.
JIM:
Mr b, we’re in danger, we’ve lost Nigel AND a whole podcast! What can we do? What does my entry say?
MR B:
Well…I don’t know, I’ve not read that far…
JIM:
Why don’t I have a Wikipedia entry?
CMAC:
One.
S/FX: INTERVIEW COUNTDOWN THEME TUNE
INTERVIEW COUNTDOWN
TONY:
Interview Countdown!
Welcome to Xxxxx.
Xxxxx is…
JIM:
Thank you Xxxx Xxxxxx. If you would like to know more about Xxxxx and his / her work you can find him / her at XXXxxxx. Contact details are also on the Jelly Trumpet website.
RIFF 8
S/FX: JAPANESE COMUTER GAME MUSIC
JIM:
I wonder where Nigel is?
MR B:
If you could just take one pace to your left Jim.
JIM:
Of course…
S/FX: BULLET BEING FIRED
MR B:
That hit the spot.
K.
[LAUGHS IN A MOST JAPANESE MANNER]
JIM:
[GROANING] MY DANGLERS!
MR B:
I’ll just adjust the angle. Now let’s see if this is the bullet of truth.
cMAC:
Preparing to fire…
ELEANOR:
Test Jim. Ask him, you know, for the truth of…something.
MR B:
OK. Right Jim; Jim, are you a good writer?
JIM:
[SOUNDING WINDED] Well, you know, have my moments, I think well, with some practice I could be…
ELEANOR:
Perhaps that’s a bullet of evasion?
MR B:
You’re right. cMac…reload.
JIM:
No! Please!
ELEANOR:
Fire!
S/FX: SOUND OF A BULLET FIRING
K.
[LAUGHS IN A MOST JAPANESE MANNER]
JIM:
[BREATHING HEAVILY] Right in the tum-tum!
ELEANOR:
Ask him again.
MR B:
Jim, are you a good writer?
JIM:
[GASPING IN PAIN] I won a BBC writing competition.
ELEANOR:
Well?
MR B:
He was a runner up.
ELEANOR:
A little lie. Continuez.
JIM:
But, [GROANING] it was only a little lie.
MR B:
Reload.
JIM:
Wait!
cMAC:
Firing.
S/FX: SOUND OF A BULLET FIRING
JIM:
IT HURTS!
ELEANOR:
Sometimes the truth does hurt.
MR B:
Jim, are you a good writer?
JIM:
I have my moments. Why are you two looking at each other like that? No!
MR B:
Half-truth.
ELEANOR:
Half-truth.
JIM:
I’m leaving.
ELEANOR:
Turn around! Face the bullet of truth!
S/FX: SOUND OF A BULLET FIRING
JIM:
I’m a writer! [IN PAIN] My arse.
ELEANOR:
Finally.
MR B:
Finally.
ELEANOR:
The truth.
cMAC:
Enemy approaching.
ELEANOR:
Let us leave.
MR B:
And get our podcast back.
cMAC:
Now it’s time for ‘Challenge Jim’.
JIM:
[SOTTO VOCE] My Piers Morgan is tingling.
S/FX: BUTTON BEING SWITCHED
S/FX: WAYS OF SEEING THEME
TONY:
Ways of Seeing!
JIM:
Have you ever tried to be another person? Have you ever tried to view yourself as others may see you? Try it. Think back to a conversation you can mostly remember. Replay the conversation in your head, only you are the other person.
Now, would you have said something else? Would the ending of that conversation be different?
If you are a writer. You’re usually going to write with some bias. Like writing a clever retort. What if you now wrote that conversation from the other point of view? Would the other person have their own retort?
If you are in digital marketing and you’ve written a campaign become the person you are addressing, what are the objections? Now you have the objections or frictions you can write a retort for each.
RIFF 9
S/FX: JAPANESE COMPUTER GAME MUSIC
JIM:
Now. Where were we? O’ yes trapped in a Japanese computer game. The score? Jelly Trumpet nil, ‘Warriors of Hope’ one. Plus, we’re missing Nigel the Sniffer Squirrel and I’ve been assaulted by a coffee machine. What else? Well, Mr b if this game goes on any longer the Germans will win on penalties.
ELEANOR:
The Germans?
MR B:
Nice people. Great sausages.
JIM:
O’ yes. Great sausages.
ELEANOR:
Enough! That’s them.
K:
[JAPANESE GIRL VOICE]
ELEANOR:
She says that’s Nagito and he’s a bit crazy.
NAGITO:
[JAPANESE VOICE] Bagels!
JIM:
OK. No one mention the bagels we found.
MR B:
That’s the starter motor!
JIM:
Where?
MR B:
Nagito is holding it.
S/FX: WHIRRING SOUND
JIM:
What’s he doing with it?
MR B:
He appears to be using it to fling bagels at people.
JIM:
Must be the stale ones.
ELEANOR:
Send in cMac.
MR B:
Right o’.
S/FX: A KERFUFFLE OF VOICES AND SHOUTS
ELEANOR:
Set to ‘bullets of lies.’
MR B:
Firing!
S/FX: MULTIPLE BULLETS BEING FIRED
ELEANOR:
Mot homme! Get the starter motor.
JIM:
Errr…
ELEANOR:
Aller!
MR B:
We’re running out of bullets.
ELEANOR:
Le café sur the bagels.
MR B:
Pouring!
S/FX: A LONG DRAWN OUT SCREAM
NAGITO:
[JAPANESE VOICE] Bagels!
JIM:
I’ve got it!
NAGITO:
[JAPANESE VOICE]
MR B:
The crazy one has got Jim!
ELEANOR:
Merde!
MR B:
He’s going to throw Jim off the roof!
ELEANOR:
Non! Non! Non!
MR B:
He’ll never survive the fall!
ELEANOR:
No! No! No. Not le Mot Homme!
JIM:
I love. Fin.
ELEANOR:
Fin? But we’re not finished yet.
MR B:
Fin is short for Finola, his daughter’s name.
ELEANOR:
Je vois. cMac?
MR B:
Out of bullets, out of coffee. Nooooooo!
S/FX: THE SOUND OF BONGOS BEING PLAYED FRANTICALLY
ELEANOR:
Nigel!
MR B:
Good boy! Get in there!
S/FX: A LONG SCREAM FADING AWAY
MR B:
Jim. You’re safe!
JIM:
But we lost Nigel. Nigel sacrificed himself for me.
ELEANOR:
A noble squirrel.
A BEAT
JIM:
Well, we have the starter motor. Now let’s go home.
K:
[JAPANESE GIRL VOICE]
ELEANOR:
Kotoko says the podcast is on the third floor.
JIM:
What are you doing Mr b?
MR B:
Looking for Nigel.
JIM:
He’s gone. He’s gone Mr b. The Noble Nigel is no more. Get cMac. Let’s get back to the podcast.
cMAC:
Time for Jim’s Medicine.
JIM:
OK. Play the Jim’s Medicine we recorded earlier cMac!
TONY:
Tales from Jim’s Medicine Journal!
TALES FROM JIM’S MEDICINE JOURNAL
JIM:
Sometimes saying stuff out loud can change one element of a piece and that change is a winner. Most writers know this. You should read your prose, your dialogue out loud. Then you know if a performer will have a problem. You want dialogue to flow.
Think of the minute changes you can make to a piece, theatre, marketing campaign, painting, knitting, performance etc, AND the biggest impact you can make from a tiny change.
I wrote some scenes for a play with two policemen on surveillance duty. The premise, or as I think of it ‘the game’ was one of escalation. So, they didn’t just chomp on doughnuts but had a seven-course meal, starting with an amuse bouche, you know an appetizer, starters, a main, dessert etc, finishing with cheese and biscuits, all while they had a villain under surveillance.
I read it out loud and I thought it a great idea. What small change could I make that would have a big impact? I went for the first thing that came into my head. One of them, the slightly lower status one, would have a Scottish accent.
That worked. Didn’t have to change the dialogue or ‘the game’. It was funnier, not sure why exactly but that minor change made major laughs.
Try it. Make a minor change to a project for a big payoff.
RIFF 10
S/FX: JAPANESE COMPUTER GAME MUSIC
MR B:
Starter motor fitted Mr Jim.
JIM:
Good work Mr b. Let’s all get back inside the podcast, where we belong.
VOICE:
WARNING! WARNING!
JIM:
What? What the hell is that!?
ELEANOR:
What is it Mr b?
MR B:
Something has triggered the podcast self-destruct button.
JIM:
O’ No! Wait. Why does the podcast need a self-destruct button?
Mr B:
Just a precaution, you know, if we get overrun by the comments section of the Daily Mail website.
JIM:
Fair enough
VOICE:
WARNING! WARNING!
JIM:
Every one inside. Mr b?
ELEANOR:
Turn the self-destruct button off. Mot Homme, while Mr b does that you can do your ‘List of the Week.’
JIM:
Right o’. Are you sure?
ELEANOR:
Oui!
S/FX: LIST OF THE WEEK JINGLE/MUSIC
LIST OF THE WEEK
TONY:
List of the week!
JIM:
This episode, 10 amusing things to do with Piers Morgan on a summer’s evening:
Number one: Roll him in butter and offer him to a litter of puppies
Number two: Dunk him in tea, is it better than a fake tan?
Number three: Holding down the edge of the tablecloth as it’s a bit breezy.
Number four: A card against humanity
Number five: Bend over for a minute Piers, need somewhere to park my bike.
Number six: An extra seat for the firepit.
Number seven: Hold a torch at the bottom of the garden, see how many moths he can catch.
Number eight: Someone to run after the ice cream van
Number nine: Taste the burger.
Number ten: I need you to talk to the Uber driver so I don’t have to.
RIFF 11
S/FX: AIR LOCK OPENING
VOICE:
Self-Destruct sequence aborted.
JIM:
You switched it off!
MR B:
With seconds to spare.
ELEANOR:
Shhhh! [WHISPERING] What’s that?
MR B:
[WHISPERING] Something is moving under her majesty’s cloak rack.
JIM:
[WHISPERING] Send in cMac?
ELEANOR:
[WHISPERING] Non. Too noisy. We move slow. We surround. We jump…on three.
A BEAT
ELEANOR:
[Cont. ] [WHISPERING] One, two, three!
S/FX: A KERFUFFLE
MR B:
Got ya!
S/FX: BONGOS PLAYING
JIM:
It’s Nigel!
ELEANOR:
Mon cher chevalier!
JIM:
Nigel, but how?
MR B:
I think we’re forgetting that first, Nigel is a homing squirrel. Second he’s used to jumping great heights and three he always lands lightly on his springy paws.
JIM:
I remember now. Mr b would you get a pair of scissors? Nigel appears to have some ribbons wrapped around his tail.
MR B:
Certainly. Here…
MONOKUMA:
Not so fast podcasters.
JIM:
Monokuma. But what, how, when, erm why?
MONOKUMA:
You have ruined the game and now vengeance will be mine! You will all DIE BY LASER!
SF/X: SNIP
A BEAT
JIM:
What happened there? Wait I know!
MR B:
Yes. Because you wrote it.
ELEANOR:
Quelle?
MR B:
Well, in Jim’s second draft I cut off Monokuma’s remote control aerial and render him harmless.
ELEANOR:
Bon!
JIM:
Mr b, if you please, set course for St Albans.
MR B:
On it Mr Jim.
S/FX: PODCAST STARTS UP
JIM’S WORK OFFER
TONY:
Jim’s Work Offer!
JIM:
I’ve written lots of stuff. I have a play for 5 people each wearing a different set of gloves. It’s a short play, around 15 – 20 minutes. It’s called Night Fell 5. If you fancy a read and putting it on drop us a line jelly@jellytrumpet.com
S/FX: OUTRO JINGLE
OUTRO
TONY:
Join us in further episodes and:
• Be more creative
• Pick up tips and tricks you can put into play instantly
• Try exercises to boost your imagination
• Listen to creative guests
• Who knows where Jelly Trumpet will land next!
Thank you for listening
If you have any questions or ideas for Jelly Trumpet
Email us jelly@jellytrumpet.com
IDENT
TONY:
That was Jelly Trumpet ‘Making you more creative’ with Jim Kinloch and Mr b.
Sponsored by Conversion Detectives, the creative content digital marketing agency. Search Conversion Detectives.
JIM:
Now here’s Mr b playing us Xxxxx by ‘We Paint Houses’ Find them on Facebook.
MUSIC
‘We Paint Houses’ tune.
JIM:
This episode of Jelly Trumpet is dedicated to my daughter Fin, the game player.
Thank you for listening. Thank you for all those that encourage Jelly Trumpet. Thank you to Mr Tony for the voice work, thank you to Ms Claire – the voice of Queen Eleanor and Mary the entrepreneur and thank you to Mr b and Kel. Stay fab.
S/FX: TUMBLEWEED BEING BLOWN ACROSS A DESERT LANDSCAPE
END OF PART II